Defining Me

We often see young girls in their teens and describe them as 'trying to figure out who they are.' They are 'testing the waters' of life and discovering who they are apart from Mom or Dad or peers. This hits a lot of girls in their college years as well. As I was thinking about it the other day, I realized that we as women never truly come to a conclusion. We are always seeking to find who we truly are! As a young woman we are seeking to know what kind of woman we will become in life, in marriage what kind of wife, in motherhood what kind of parent...it continues on our whole lives. Who am I?

The mirror does not define me. You may not look like the air-brushed model on the cover of Vogue. You most likely do not even look like you did ten years ago. You most likely don't weigh what you did ten years ago either! And everyone knows that I have a different hairstyle, and color, to fit the season! I have learned, however, that I haven't changed. The girl in the mirror has, but who I am, truly am, is still the same. I'm me. And I am more than an image.

My home does not define me. Ok, you know it is all the rave to post and pin all your greatest triumphs. We all have a "wall" full of great ideas we will never do. We invision our living rooms in the latest colors with antiqued furniture, fragrant blooming flowering plants, handsewn curtains to compliment, and all our fancy handmade wall hangings. In reality, we have Grandma's hand-me down sofa, paint chipped wall that don't match our furniture, walls plastered with photos of our kids, and toys all over the room. We freak when people come over and we haven't had time to shove stuff in closets and vacuum once over! Why? Another lie. Our homes are meant to be places of refuge and loving memories, not a display of your value as a woman.

My activities do not define me. President of this club or that? Soccer coach? 4-H project leader? It leaves me hopping from one place to another, feeling overwhelmed, drained and not as good as I think it sounds. I want others to see what I do for the community and my family, because that is another way I seek to define me. The truth? Anybody can do it. I am not a list of accomplishments.

My husband does not define me. Ok, now we are getting deep. I learned early on in marriage that husbands often make choices the wives would not make. They say things we would not say and share things we would rather not share. They may have friends with those we don't get along with. And sometimes they fail. Their failure is not our failure. I also found that when he talked about hunting and motors that I listened with love, but not interest. Likewise, as I rattled off about my latest novel or some cultural tidbit I had learned while studying, I could see him fade away. It isn't that we don't love one another. It is that we are created differently, to function differently, and blend together beautifully. I must be my own person, not the person I believe he wants me to be, and then I will find that he loves me just as I am!

My children do not define me. This is probably the hardest one to swallow. You know that I spend 99% of my time on them? 90% of my photos in the album of myself are with them? That is what got me thinking on this whole thing to start with. Who am I when I am done raising them?  I spend so much of my time trying to raise my children in the best way possible. Then that moment strikes - they do something childish! As our kids grow, they begin to make friends on their own. They begin to make their own choices and have their own likes and dislikes. They become their own little person. While I had a hand in it, ultimately they will grow to be who God has designed them to be. All the running around and cleaning and disciplining and laundry and schooling and all the things we do as mothers are out of love for them. And then they will leave. As much as we believe, who we are does not hinge on our children. They are a part of our lives that we cherish and adore and pour ourselves into, but each of us has a unique way of mothering and it should not be judged or compared by any other mother. We are not defined in that way!

So, now that I have stripped away  in essence every part of who I believe that I am, then I am left wondering, how do I define me?

"For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." -- Ephesians 2:10

I am a beautiful masterpiece of God. I have been uniquely made with gifts and talents, passions and preferences, quirks and character. He made me who I am so that I could do all those other things - the good works - which He planned for me to do from the beginning. The type of mother, wife, community leader, home-keeper and person that I am from inside to out is all from the outflow of the woman that God created me to be. In my uniqueness I will not be (and should not try to be!) like any other woman. I am me. I am a masterpiece. My Creator defines me.

You Are Just Right

I don't know about you, but I constantly battle with feeling not good enough for my family. I want to be more. I want to be better. I want to be that mom that my kids remember from their childhood and smile about. Or want to be like me, to follow my lead.

My mom was not perfect. Not even close. And in many ways she did a much better job than I do. What is ironic is that it isn't those mess-ups or those super-mom accomplishments that I look back on so fondly. I remember mostly her character. I remember never feeling unloved. I remember her giving her all for us all the time. I remember the fun times we shared playing board games, camping, or doing family holiday traditions. I remember when she would make treasure hunts for me while she cleaned the house. I remember her making some of my favorite foods, and her teaching me to make them too. And most of the "bad" things I remember, I recall them being my fault. My mom is my hero. She is my best friends still. She is the type of mom that I strive to be. She was just right for me.

You are just right for your child, for your husband, for your family. I am just right for mine. See, God in his infinite wisdom has molded you and gifted you to be everything that they need! You will mess up. You will succeed. You will have "failure mom" days and you will have "Super-mom" days. But what you do in between and through both of those, the character you display, the love you express, that is what your kids will look back on with a smile; that is who your kids will want to grow up to be like.

Think about what you want them to see, day in and day out, high and low, in a mom...then be that mom. You are just right for the job.

It's All in the Name

        Do you know the meaning of your name?  Mine means “victorious one.”  When my son was born, we chose his middle name, Judah, specifically because it meant, “praise.”  In the Old Testament it was extremely important the meaning of one’s name.  Many places we see God changing the name of an individual to fit who they were to become or what role they were to play in His story. 

            Do you remember Sarah from the Bible, Abraham's wife? Well, Sarah’s name meant Princess.  This is significant because GOD CHOSE this name for her.  Why did he name her Princess?  To let us know that as His daughters, we are Princesses, no matter who we are.  Galatians 4:7 tells us, “So you are no longer a slave, but a son; and since you are a son, God has made you also an heir,” and 1 John 3:2 says, “now we are children of God.”  If we are children of God, the King of kings, then we too are royalty!

            In His book, Knowing God, J.I. Packer lays out what Sarah’s life demonstrates, “In this world, royal children have to undergo extra training and discipline which other children escape, in order to fit them for their high destiny.  It is the same with the children of the King of kings…It is no part of justifying faith to lose sight of the fact that God, the King, wants his royal children to live lives worthy of their paternity and position.” (222-223). 

            How often do you feel like your life is full of hardships and trials?  Or just the mundane, day after day routine?  Just remember, you are in training!  God is building in you the character that it takes to be a princess!  You need to see the world around you from God’s eyes.  You need to seize every opportunity given you to grow and learn, and to impact the lives of others.  You need to learn to live up to your “paternity and position.” 

            I love what William Wallace says to the princess in BRAVEHEART, “One day you will be a Queen and you must open your eyes.”  My dearest sister in Christ, one day YOU will be a Queen, the heiress of the kingdom of the King of kings, and YOU MUST OPEN YOUR EYES!  There is a world out there that does not want to see you succeed.  There is an enemy waiting to capture you in his evil schemes.  And there are lost children out there needing the touch of their healing Father that only YOU, His daughter, can bring them.  You MUST be aware of these things.  You are a princess, the daughter of a King, now live like one.

The Guilt of a Dreamer

My "dream list" includes spending time on every continent, gliding down the Amazon River to spend days lost in the treacherous jungles, translating the Bible for a people who have never held the Gospel in their hands before, packing up and leaving all of my troubles and struggles behind, growing old with my husband on a beach watching the sunset, and looking like Nicole Kidman when I am her age!

Those are just a few of the things I would love to do with my life. I find, however, that when I begin to dream these, or even less harmful dreams like a romantic get-away, a new outfit, or remodeling my bathroom, I begin to feel guilty.
As moms, I believe we become too accustomed to being the "nobody" of the house. Sure, we all encourage our obsessive behavior by telling each other that our homes cannot function without us...but in the process we lose who we are. It becomes a joke and laughing matter because we are lost as to what to do about it.  Our kids' and our husband's well-being come before our own. They get clothes before we do. School supplies come before our novel reading list. Their food tastes take precedence over our own. How they choose to spend free time becomes what we do. Their schedules become our schedules. We push ourselves out of fear of becoming that mom who neglects her children and puts herself and her selfish desires before that of the care of her family. We will not be that woman!

After time of living with this mind-set, we can lose sight of who we are - our passions, our dreams, our simple pleasures. When we begin to dream, our logic screams at us, "what about the kids!? How would that affect them?! That's selfish!" And then we feel guilty for ever dreaming at all.

I am writing this today because I think this is wrong. I think that God has created us with adventure and dreams in our hearts! I believe that we should be willing to take a look and see what else is out there, what more life can have in store for us! Give a little more room for yourself sometimes. You spend all of your time and extra money on your children - get yourself a gift sometimes! Plan a night out for yourself or you and your spouse! Don't be afraid to be a woman with her own dreams and desires. This doesn't necessarily mean packing up and heading out to some remote island (though it might!) but it may include breaking the unhealthy walls of the rooms we have built ourselves into. What we might find is that our marriages are strengthened because we return to being the woman our husbands married. We may make our children proud of our accomplishments and give them inspiration to reach their own goals and dreams. You may find fulfillment and pleasure in your life that you had given up hope of ever having.

Dream big!

I'm That Little Girl

I have been so frustrated this whole week. My Princess has entered into a stage where she moves slower than a sloth to do anything and absolutely nothing can motivate her to accomplish the things she needs to in a day - getting ready in the morning, caring for pets, doing her school work. The lost privileges and consequences have no effect. She simply doesn't care and doesn't understand why she should. I want to pull my hair out in exasperation at trying to get her to realize that she is missing out on so much good stuff in life by draaaaaaaagggging out the work!



Flashback. There was once another little girl just like this - me. I clearly remember being about eight years old, standing on a giant rock in the middle of my grandmother's garden, performing a song at the top of my lungs with the world as my audience. I was free! It was fun! Problem? I was supposed to be weeding the garden. My grandmother had told me that if I pulled the weeds from her flowerbed she would pay me and also take me to the movies that evening. I remember her coming out of the house time and time again to urge me to get the work done...to hurry...to stay focused and motivated. I never understood until now.

I am still that little girl. It has occurred to me that we are all like this in our spiritual walks. God is constantly urging us to do more, make more of ourselves. Our response? We would rather waste time on things that don't matter, wallow in irrelevance and get sidetracked by everything else around us! Chores, status, finances, jobs, relationships, gossip, possessions...the list could go on and on. God doesn't encourage us to push these things aside and focus on His Kingdom because He is just a big meanie! He does it because he knows that if we focus on what is truly important, if we work hard and get "things" done, then there will be rewards! Life will be more exciting and fulfilling! 

Stop dragging your feet and get busy! You've got a life to live!

You Will Never Be Good Enough

Yep, you read that right. You will never be good enough. Now hold on before you click to some other link that is more upbeat and cheery. This really is a pep-talk!

I have always been that girl that has to do everything right. I actually get very upset if I don't accomplish what I wanted to. It was great when I was younger going through school. It got me good grades. It kept me from making stupid decisions (most of the time). You get the picture. However, as a mom, it has not been a great quality to have. Of course we should always strive to do our best, but my problem was that if I didn't have all the items on my to-do list checked off, if my house wasn't up to "par," if my kids were having "one of those days," even if I were sick and didn't get my ducks in a row...I felt like I had failed. I was a failure as a mom. I was a failure as a wife. I was just a failure.

Well, in a way, the Bible says that is true. Let's explore:

Isaiah 64:6 says, "For all of us have become like one who is unclean, And all our righteous deeds are like a filthy garment;"

Ephesians 2:8-9 says, "For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God; not as a result of works, so that no one may boast."

We can never be good enough! There are never enough good things that we can do to make all of our mistakes "ok." We can never serve enough or give enough to pay the price for our wrong choices. That is why God sent His Son.

This isn't a bad thing! It's grace! It is freeing! What this tells me is that I can stop striving! I can stop trying to be perfect. I can stop trying to be the perfect mom. I will never be. I can stop trying to be the perfect wife. I will never be. But, that doesn't make me a failure. It makes me beautiful. Yes, because Jesus blood has cleansed me and I am now in right relationship with God. With His Spirit in me, guiding me and sanctifying me, I am perfect. The way that I am now seen is not based on what I have accomplished, but on what He has accomplished for me. I can live a life without the burden of checking things off the list and focus on loving others and sharing this message of grace with everyone that I can.

Now, that is a pep-talk!

Reset

Have you ever had your computer freeze up on you? There is just too much going on in its intricate little brain, too many uploads, too much information, too many commands. My husband is notorious for losing work he's spent hours on because he forgets to "save as you go!" The worst for me is when I am in the middle of watching a movie (we do online tv/movies) and right when you are about to figure it all out - freeze.  I believe that we all learned early on those magic key-strokes (ctrl+alt+delete). Now the world of technology has a "refresh" button!

I believe that sometimes our lives are just like our overloaded computers. There is just too much going on inside our brains that we are responsible for. There are experiences changing us and teaching us. There are too many things that we must remember (shopping lists, bills due, children's extra-curriculars, laundry, dishes, church events, call your mother, feed the animals, did you feed the kids today?). And there are just too many demands! On just Monday I schooled my children, cleaned my house, took my daughter to her bread-making class, coached a soccer practice, rushed back over for a 4-H meeting, then made it home just in time to bathe the kids, read them their story, put them in bed, grab some food and ask my husband how his volleyball tournament went (they won 1st place!).

Freeze. Do you remember that verse from Psalm 46:10?
"He says, “Be still, and know that I am God;"
I will tell it to you straight - we can not live our lives at top speed like this if we want to continue to have joy, purpose and fulfillment. We will kill ourselves. Our lives and the impact we have on others is a direct overflow from what is within us. If we have tapped into our reserve tanks and run them dry as well, we are in a bad position.  Last week we took our Easter break. I committed to do nothing that was not absolutely necessary. I laid around and watched movies with my kids. We had a week-long Monopoly game going. We ate...a lot. I read a book. I breathed.
Is it time for you, dear friend, to freeze for a little while?

Ctrl+Alt+Delete.
In Jeremiah 31:25 our Lord reminds us that,
"I will refresh the weary and satisfy the faint.”
I think that often times we get carried away with all our comings and goings. It is important that each of us take a time out and reset. On my wonderful Easter break, after I began to breathe again, I then began to think again.  I thought about my family and my children. I realized I had let a lot of the simple, but important things slip through the cracks while focused on the less important "pressing" things. I recommitted. Think about the things you do, why you do them, and what may be missing.
Here are a few things that I think you should consider when you reset:
Purpose - don't do anything unless there is a purpose. If the purpose doesn't fit what you want for your life, for your children, or for your ministry, then don't waste your time on it! (this would also be a good idea for you to think about what your purpose is for your life and your family)
Family driven - your children grow so fast. Make sure that the things you do now cultivate your family being united. Do things together!
Fill Your Own Cup - make sure that you include time for yourself occasionally. Make sure that this time is fulfilling to you, not a time where you are still giving. Have a ladies night out, go to a retreat, spend time at a book store with a hot chai latte (my favorite!). Fill your own spirit!
Cultivate Your Marriage - make sure that everything you do is working toward a common vision between you and your spouse. Make sure to spend time alone with your spouse. Make sure that you regularly have energy at the end of the day to devote to intimacy. Take time outs to do special things to remind them that you love them!
Good Isn't Always Best - The hardest part for me is to weed out the unnecessary when everything is "good." Sometimes something doesn't have to be "bad" in order to cut it out. It just may not be the "best" thing in your life right now.

Don't miss out on the beauty, the charm, the blessings of your life because you are too busy running through life. You know that old idiom "Stop and smell the roses." There is beauty flowing from everything around us, but we must take the time to see it.  Now, go ahead and hit that refresh button in your life!

Desperate

There was a blow up at my house today between me and my six year old daughter. We are just alike. What I realized today, however, was that my children have, over the course of some time, become spoiled.  I never wanted a spoiled child, however, I have always striven to be the best mom I could be, sacrificing to give to them, etc. And now they believe that the world revolves around them and they do not appreciate anything that they have. But what is worst of all, my daughter has begun to lack passion for things.  Today I decided to make some changes around the house. We would begin to get less until we learn to appreciate that which we have. The initial response was less-than hoped for, but we are moving forward now.

Meanwhile, seemingly unrelated, I was talking to my mom on the phone and she was telling me about one of those valleys that we all go through, when we wonder why God allows so much hardship to happen to us. Of course, my typical answer is that it is just the consequences of living in a fallen world.

As I was doing dishes, I suddenly realized that these two things are actually related to one another, extremely related. Let me explain...

We have all, at some point in our lives, been desperate for God. Desperate. As the breath that we breathe, we needed his presence, his hand in our situations, his strength, passionately desiring Him. Can you think of that time? I would bet money on the fact that this was not an easy time in your life. Quite possibly it was one of the worst times of your life. That is the connection.

Without the "valleys" of our lives, we would never experience that desperation and passion for God. If everything were peachy all the time, we would, like my daughter, lose our interest in everything, lose our appreciation for our blessings and our passion for life. Without tears, how could we experience pure joy and truly understand it? Without pain, how would we understand comfort? Without heartbreak, how would we realize true love - how would we even know it was true love without experiencing the loss of it? It is for no small reason that the saying "you never realize how much you love something until it is gone" or similar is so well known.

God wants to spoil us. God wants to give us everything. God does not want to cause us pain or suffering. But sometimes, for our own good, He allows us to endure it. This evening, my dear Spirit has spoken to my heart. I must change how I interact with my children. It is not good for me to give them everything. I must also change how I interact with my God. What do I need to strip away to be grateful of Him again? This is the focus of this household for now. May we in the near future be found desperate for Him.

Family Resolutions

Today is the last day of 2012. Looking back, we have had a very fun and full, and at times trying, year. The older my kids get, the more the new year is a time for me to give thanks for all the blessings we have received the past year, and a year to evaluate and focus on where we want our family to go in the next year. As you are planning what your New Year resolutions will be, I thought I would share with you how our family goes about our resolutions.

Each year we begin by reviewing last year's resolutions and how we were able to accomplish or not accomplish them. This is a great way to help us to live intentionally in our lives. Then we make our new resolutions and put them in a special place so that we can focus on them in the year to come, and read them next December 31! Since our kids were little when we began this, we made questions to make resolution-making simple and a little more fun. Here are our resolution questions (feel free to use them if you wish!):

1) What bad habit do you resolve to quit this year? This year, same as last, I resolve to stop biting my nails. **sigh**

2) What do you resolve to do to better yourself this year? I would like to exercise regularly (past January!) and to try to be more stress-free.

3) What new thing would you like to try this year?  I love this question, because it prompts dreaming, reaching for something beyond the usual. However, as a logical-minded person, I struggle thinking of things. Last year, I resolved to go deer hunting with my husband and in November I took down my first deer. This year, I decided to try not to be so logical-minded and go with the first thing I could think of, and ended up resolving to ride a motorcycle alone.

4) Our last question takes our goals and dreams to the heart-level. What fruit of the Spirit would you like to harvest more of this year? Considering the hardships that I went through this year, especially this summer, I want to grow more joy in my life. Others in my family chose love, peace and patience.

The new year is a wonderful time of year to focus on where you want your life to go. How do you want to strive to be a better person and what will you do to actually reach your goals and dreams?

As I close this year, I want to glorify my Father in heaven for all the blessings that He has given to me, all of the things He has seen me through, and all the ways I have seen Him working around me.
Happy New Year and blessings for 2013!!!

12 Days of Christmas Traditions I Love: Day 12 Christmas Morning Surprises

The issue of Santa bringing gifts on Christmas Eve is one of much debate within Christian circles. Questions arise such as: how do we tell them Santa is real and God is real and then later Santa is not real and expect them to believe in God? How can I flat out lie to my children? Doesn't Santa take our focus off of the true meaning of Christmas?

I had Santa when I was little. I never found it a conflicting issue with God, and neither did my sister, to my knowledge. However, I was not sure on which side I stood when the time came for my daughter's first Christmas. My husband and I decided that we would let the kids lead. We would not lie to them, but we would only tell them what they asked. We decided we would not actually tell them Santa came on Christmas Eve, but we wouldn't say that he didn't either. We would not call the gifts on Christmas morning "Gifts from Santa," rather "Christmas morning surprises." We were really unsure of how it would go.

My daughter was only two when our first issue came up. She was a deep thinker from the start and as we sat there making Christmas cookies that year, she asked me, "Is Santa like Jesus, is that why I can't see him?" I knew then that was where I had to make a decision. It was an easy one to make. My daughter's salvation and faith in Christ could not be confused with a make-believe story of Santa. I explained to her that Jesus was real and that Santa was a made-up story that people like to pretend at Christmas. I told her it was like when she played dress up and pretended to be a princess, etc. She understood and continued to "pretend" Santa was coming that year and the years to follow. Her brother didn't ask outright and we didn't tell him outright, but as he asks his simple questions about Santa, we make sure to give him honest answers. He believes in Santa but is starting to realize that Daddy is that jolly old elf!

Santa is a beautiful story of giving and joy, and in a way reflects the meaning of Christmas - giving and joy. We should embrace the story in just that way to add it to our Christmas celebration, not having to decided between Santa and Jesus.  Christmas is just not the same to me without little ones going to bed early so they can wake mom and dad up at the break of dawn and run out to see what is awaiting them under the tree. It is innocence, joy and beautiful.

In whatever way you choose to approach tomorrow morning, I hope your morning is filled with laughter, love and the joy that Christ brought into the world that Christmas day long ago!

12 Days of Holiday Traditions I Love: Day 11 Candlelight Service

As Christmas approaches the anticipation grows. That is what I love about the candlelight service. It focuses our minds and hearts on what exactly we are anticipating. As the 10 virgins awaited the bridegroom in the parable, we reflect on the first coming of Christ and anxiously await his second coming. The gorgeous candles symbolize this and Christ, the light of the world.

That was the true Light which gives light to every man coming into the world. John 1:9

Jesus was born over two thousand years ago into a dark and sinful world. He brough light and hope. This is what we celebrate at Christmas and there is no better way to focus on this than to attend a candle light service on Christmas Eve.

image from crossroadschurchroselake.blogspot.com

12 Days of Christmas Traditions I Love: Day 8 Holiday Baking

This morning I realized that I have had to really clean my kitchen every day this week! Why? From all the baking! It is time consuming, sometimes hard, but oh, so fun and delicious! What is better than holiday baked meals?? Nothing!

 

With all of the parties for church, the kids, meals for others, Christmas gifts and just our own holiday meals, I have baked so many things I can't even remember! Most of the things I make you can find on Pinterest. You can find the recipe to my favorite meal, homemade chicken pot pie, here. I only made SIX of these babies this week!

 

 

 

Holidays are the only time I seem to be able to splurge and make lots of fancy foods for my family. Go all out! It is so much fun. And as for those pounds...well, you need a New Year's resolution, right?

12 Days of Christmas Traditions I Love: Day 7 Christmas Lights

"The people who sat in darkness have seen a great light,
And upon those who sat in the region and shadow of death
Light has dawned.” --Matthew 4:16

One of the reasons I love Christmas is the atmosphere and decorations and all the lights! It is so beautiful! At Christmas we are celebrating that Jesus is the light of the world. Each year, my husband and I load up the kiddos and drive around looking at the lights around town.

This year, we decided to add a little extra fun to our regular drive. We told the kids that they were going to get a ride on the Polar Express! My husband went out and decorated the inside of the car with Christmas lights and put our favorite Christmas CD in the player. I printed off some Polar Express tickets off of Google and placed them underneath their dinner plates. We made each a travel mug of hot cocoa. We had them take their baths and get into pjs early and then come to dinner. After they had eaten their dinner, we told them to look under the plates. My husband and I pretended to be conductors and loaded them up on the Polar Express! Then we drove around to look at the lights. It was so much fun!

If you haven't already, take a family trip around town tonight!

12 Days of Christmas Traditions I Love: Day 6 Caroling at the Care Center

I remember going to sing Christmas carols at the care center with my family when my son was only five months old. One of those moments passed that you hold on to and "ponder in your heart." I remember watching as my mom, holding my infant son on her hip, walked in to an elderly woman's room and reached out her hand to her and spoke with her and showed her my little boy. I remember this woman using all her strength to rise out of bed toward my mom to take her hand and see the baby. There was such joy on the woman's face. I realized several things at that moment. One, I have an incredibly compassionate mother who sets a great example for those around her. Two, I wanted to raise my children to love those around them in this way as second nature by raising them with the same example as I had before me this night.

Six years later, I am beginning to see the fruits of this labor. We once again visited the care center to sing carols with some of my children's friends. I was almost brought to tears as I saw my daughter unhesitatingly enter the rooms of the residents to shake their hands and give them a hand-made ornament. I was proud as I watched her little brother follow her example at four years old, as he shook hands and said "Merry Christmas" to each person.

Caroling at the Care Center is definitely on my list of favorite Christmas traditions. Besides the above, here are a few reasons why I think you should visit the care center:

1) It brings joy and excitement to the residents
2) It reminds us of the true meaning of Christmas - loving and giving
3) It teaches our children to get out of their box and think about others before themselves
4) It nourishes the residents fulfilling our command to care for the widows and orphans, which goes beyond just their physical, but their emotional and spiritual needs as well.

If you haven't had an opportunity to go this year, look for a church or group that is going, or make your own small group. Find a few of your favorite Christmas carols, buy a pack of ornaments or candy canes to hand out and just go. You will be so blessed!

12 Days of Christmas Christmas Traditions I Love: Day 5 Family Christmas Movies

What else do you do when it's cold outside and getting dark early and you are anxiously awaiting Christmas? Watch Christmas movies! We love to make a night of watching our favorite Christmas movies. We even like to have themed parties around these great movies as well! (see How To Have a Successful Grinch Party) 

Necessary items for your Christmas movie night: a special snack or dinner, hot chocolate, snuggly blankets, pillows, Christmas lights!

Here is our list of our top 5 favorite Christmas movies:
Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer
It's a Wonderful Life
Frosty the Snowman
How the Grinch Stole Christmas
Miracle on 34th Street

Snuggle up, and have a blast!

Note: For those of you who have been following my 12 Days of Christmas Traditions I Love, you may have noticed that I skipped day 4. This was on purpose in light of the events in CT. My 4th favorite is our annual Children's Christmas Program. For whatever reason, I could not bring myself to write this one so close to so many losing their precious children at Christmas. Continued thoughts and prayers for those families.

12 Days of Christmas Traditions I Love: Day 3 Christmas Stories

One of my absolute favorite things to do with my kiddos during the Christmas season is to read Christmas stories. Our family enjoys reading altogher, all year round. It is my favorite time of the evening. Christmas stories are those that you can read over and over again and they just never get dull! I remember a big book my mom had when we were growing up that had 4 different Christmas stories in it. I loved it!

Here is a list of our top 5 favorite Christmas stories (there are so many, I had to limit!):

Llama Llama Holiday Drama, by Anna Dewdney
Bear Stays Up for Christmas, by Karma Wilson
Froggy's Best Christmas, by Jonathan London
Follow the Star, by Rachel Brown
The Night Before Christmas (just about any version!)

We also love to spend a lot of time at the library choosing Christmas books. Chances are, just about any series of books your child loves to read will have a Christmas one. My kids love to search out their favorites - Madaline, Olivia, Max and Ruby, Clifford, Froggy, Winnie the Pooh, Splat the Cat, Pete the Cat, Fletcher, Disney Princesses, American Girls - and the list has changed and grown over the years - but they all have a Christmas edition! If you have older children, read aloud a classic Christmas novel like Little Women or A Christmas Carol or the Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe!

Snuggle up this week in front of the lit Christmas tree and read, read, read! It is such a special time to share together!

12 Days of Christmas Traditions I Love: Day 2 The Advent Wreath

I know, I know! I have already posted on the advent wreath, but it just had to go on my top 12 list! So if you want to read about what we do with the advent wreath and why it is one of my favorites, check out my post from last week here.  Have a very blessed 11 days til Christmas!

12 Days of Christmas Traditions I Love: Day 1 The Christmas Tree

I am so excited that Christmas is just 12 days away! I have decided to share with you my top 12 favorite Christmas traditions! Some of them we have done already, and some I am waiting anxiously to do sometime in the next twelve days!!

I would like to begin with the Christmas tree! Now we have had many adventures with Christmas trees since the kids were little. Our first three years of marriage, we had a tiny 2ft tree that our princess would decorate. Finally, we decided to get a real tree and our cat knocked the whole thing down! The next year, I thought I had found a great buy at the local dollar store - a 6' artificial tree for $25 - which ended up being only about 1' around and my best friend dubbed it the "anorexic Christmas tree." We went back to buying real trees.

We make a night of it! We put the date on the calendar and go out as a family to pick out, purchase, and carry home our precious tree. That evening we spend decorating it together as a family. Daddy makes some hot drinks to have while we do it, and I like to put on a little Christmas music (my favorite is Bing Crosby!). When it is complete, we sit by the Christmas tree light and cuddle and read our favorite Christmas stories!

One of our special traditions with the Christmas tree is our yearly ornaments. Each year we buy an ornament that has a special meaning to our family. Then, as we begin our tree decorating, we start at the first year's ornament - my husband and my first year of marriage, and then we work through the years and look at each ornament and remember the meaning and memories behind it. I think this year I will make a photo album with each ornament and the meaning to have saved for years to come!

Happy 12 Days Til Christmas!

The Advent Wreath

The advent wreath has been a symbol in the Christian church since possibly the early 16th century. It's purpose is to focus one's heart on Christmas for the 4 weeks leading up to Christmas day. Each candle symbolizes a Sunday before Christmas. The candles all have reflective meanings like Hope, Love, and Joy.

Growing up, my family did the advent wreath every year. It is one of my favorite memories. My mom had a box of mini devotion books and Christian poems and prayer books and each of us would choose something from them to read each night around the wreath. Dad would read a portion of the Bible and we would sing a Christmas hymn. I think the reason it so stood out to me is because this is the only time of the year in which my family would sit down to devotion time together.

While we do devotion time every morning (or almost) in our home, I still like to keep that special advent tradition. Because of my budget our first year, I purchased this booklet that cost only $.99 to lead us. I fell in love with it. It has a new year published each year and this year I got the eBook version for only $.65! It is called the Abingdon Press "Advent: A Calendar of Devotions." You can find it at just about any Christian bookstore, or at www.christianbook.com.

Each evening my husband reads the passage from the Bible. Then I read the devotion. My daughter will usually read the prayer. My son isn't able to read those things yet, so we try to let him help lead the song for the evening and blow out the candle!

I would encourage you to find some way to focus your family's heart on the true meaning of Christmas during this season. I will not rant about the over-commercialization of Christmas, but the truth is that this season is all about Christ's birth. God loved us so much that he sent his one and only Son...let's remember!

Remebrance of Sincere Faith

Do you ever wonder what you would be doing if you weren't a mom? Occasionally, I do. It is amazing to me that once a woman of faith takes on motherhood and the raising of her child, all else seems to slip away. We often joke about having "no life," because every last effort in a day is consumed by doing the most to raise those beautiful blessings. And sometimes, if you are like me, you wonder if all that you do is even worth it. Will they even care? Will it make a difference?

The biblical mother and daughter pair Eunice and Lois remind me that it is most definitely worth it. Paul immortalized these two women with one statement in a letter to their grandson/son Timothy:

"I am reminded of your sincere faith, a faith that dwelt first in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice and now, I am sure, dwells in you as well." 2 Timothy 1:5

Sincere faith. We don't know much about Eunice or Lois, but we know a lot about Timothy. Just knowing that these two women were the ones that taught him about God and the Scripture from the time he was a small child (2 Timothy 3:15) is enough for us to know that they were good moms. They did what it took. They raised him with a fear and love of God - a sincere faith. And they did a great job. At least as far as Paul was concerned, all their efforts did make a difference in the character of Timothy and how God was able to use him in the early church.

It's ok to get worn out. That is when we must turn to the God who is our fulfillment, our breath of life. Just remember today that it all matters! Let go of all the things that don't. Feel free to make a mess if it gives a few laughs. Let the laundry pile up on a sunny day. Teach them to fear and love the Lord. Teach them to enjoy the beautiful life around them. Make those memories! Build those relationships so that you may pass on that sincere faith.

Comment: Do you have a Eunice or Lois in your life? Tell us about her!