Defining Me

We often see young girls in their teens and describe them as 'trying to figure out who they are.' They are 'testing the waters' of life and discovering who they are apart from Mom or Dad or peers. This hits a lot of girls in their college years as well. As I was thinking about it the other day, I realized that we as women never truly come to a conclusion. We are always seeking to find who we truly are! As a young woman we are seeking to know what kind of woman we will become in life, in marriage what kind of wife, in motherhood what kind of parent...it continues on our whole lives. Who am I?

The mirror does not define me. You may not look like the air-brushed model on the cover of Vogue. You most likely do not even look like you did ten years ago. You most likely don't weigh what you did ten years ago either! And everyone knows that I have a different hairstyle, and color, to fit the season! I have learned, however, that I haven't changed. The girl in the mirror has, but who I am, truly am, is still the same. I'm me. And I am more than an image.

My home does not define me. Ok, you know it is all the rave to post and pin all your greatest triumphs. We all have a "wall" full of great ideas we will never do. We invision our living rooms in the latest colors with antiqued furniture, fragrant blooming flowering plants, handsewn curtains to compliment, and all our fancy handmade wall hangings. In reality, we have Grandma's hand-me down sofa, paint chipped wall that don't match our furniture, walls plastered with photos of our kids, and toys all over the room. We freak when people come over and we haven't had time to shove stuff in closets and vacuum once over! Why? Another lie. Our homes are meant to be places of refuge and loving memories, not a display of your value as a woman.

My activities do not define me. President of this club or that? Soccer coach? 4-H project leader? It leaves me hopping from one place to another, feeling overwhelmed, drained and not as good as I think it sounds. I want others to see what I do for the community and my family, because that is another way I seek to define me. The truth? Anybody can do it. I am not a list of accomplishments.

My husband does not define me. Ok, now we are getting deep. I learned early on in marriage that husbands often make choices the wives would not make. They say things we would not say and share things we would rather not share. They may have friends with those we don't get along with. And sometimes they fail. Their failure is not our failure. I also found that when he talked about hunting and motors that I listened with love, but not interest. Likewise, as I rattled off about my latest novel or some cultural tidbit I had learned while studying, I could see him fade away. It isn't that we don't love one another. It is that we are created differently, to function differently, and blend together beautifully. I must be my own person, not the person I believe he wants me to be, and then I will find that he loves me just as I am!

My children do not define me. This is probably the hardest one to swallow. You know that I spend 99% of my time on them? 90% of my photos in the album of myself are with them? That is what got me thinking on this whole thing to start with. Who am I when I am done raising them?  I spend so much of my time trying to raise my children in the best way possible. Then that moment strikes - they do something childish! As our kids grow, they begin to make friends on their own. They begin to make their own choices and have their own likes and dislikes. They become their own little person. While I had a hand in it, ultimately they will grow to be who God has designed them to be. All the running around and cleaning and disciplining and laundry and schooling and all the things we do as mothers are out of love for them. And then they will leave. As much as we believe, who we are does not hinge on our children. They are a part of our lives that we cherish and adore and pour ourselves into, but each of us has a unique way of mothering and it should not be judged or compared by any other mother. We are not defined in that way!

So, now that I have stripped away  in essence every part of who I believe that I am, then I am left wondering, how do I define me?

"For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." -- Ephesians 2:10

I am a beautiful masterpiece of God. I have been uniquely made with gifts and talents, passions and preferences, quirks and character. He made me who I am so that I could do all those other things - the good works - which He planned for me to do from the beginning. The type of mother, wife, community leader, home-keeper and person that I am from inside to out is all from the outflow of the woman that God created me to be. In my uniqueness I will not be (and should not try to be!) like any other woman. I am me. I am a masterpiece. My Creator defines me.

You Are Just Right

I don't know about you, but I constantly battle with feeling not good enough for my family. I want to be more. I want to be better. I want to be that mom that my kids remember from their childhood and smile about. Or want to be like me, to follow my lead.

My mom was not perfect. Not even close. And in many ways she did a much better job than I do. What is ironic is that it isn't those mess-ups or those super-mom accomplishments that I look back on so fondly. I remember mostly her character. I remember never feeling unloved. I remember her giving her all for us all the time. I remember the fun times we shared playing board games, camping, or doing family holiday traditions. I remember when she would make treasure hunts for me while she cleaned the house. I remember her making some of my favorite foods, and her teaching me to make them too. And most of the "bad" things I remember, I recall them being my fault. My mom is my hero. She is my best friends still. She is the type of mom that I strive to be. She was just right for me.

You are just right for your child, for your husband, for your family. I am just right for mine. See, God in his infinite wisdom has molded you and gifted you to be everything that they need! You will mess up. You will succeed. You will have "failure mom" days and you will have "Super-mom" days. But what you do in between and through both of those, the character you display, the love you express, that is what your kids will look back on with a smile; that is who your kids will want to grow up to be like.

Think about what you want them to see, day in and day out, high and low, in a mom...then be that mom. You are just right for the job.

It's All in the Name

        Do you know the meaning of your name?  Mine means “victorious one.”  When my son was born, we chose his middle name, Judah, specifically because it meant, “praise.”  In the Old Testament it was extremely important the meaning of one’s name.  Many places we see God changing the name of an individual to fit who they were to become or what role they were to play in His story. 

            Do you remember Sarah from the Bible, Abraham's wife? Well, Sarah’s name meant Princess.  This is significant because GOD CHOSE this name for her.  Why did he name her Princess?  To let us know that as His daughters, we are Princesses, no matter who we are.  Galatians 4:7 tells us, “So you are no longer a slave, but a son; and since you are a son, God has made you also an heir,” and 1 John 3:2 says, “now we are children of God.”  If we are children of God, the King of kings, then we too are royalty!

            In His book, Knowing God, J.I. Packer lays out what Sarah’s life demonstrates, “In this world, royal children have to undergo extra training and discipline which other children escape, in order to fit them for their high destiny.  It is the same with the children of the King of kings…It is no part of justifying faith to lose sight of the fact that God, the King, wants his royal children to live lives worthy of their paternity and position.” (222-223). 

            How often do you feel like your life is full of hardships and trials?  Or just the mundane, day after day routine?  Just remember, you are in training!  God is building in you the character that it takes to be a princess!  You need to see the world around you from God’s eyes.  You need to seize every opportunity given you to grow and learn, and to impact the lives of others.  You need to learn to live up to your “paternity and position.” 

            I love what William Wallace says to the princess in BRAVEHEART, “One day you will be a Queen and you must open your eyes.”  My dearest sister in Christ, one day YOU will be a Queen, the heiress of the kingdom of the King of kings, and YOU MUST OPEN YOUR EYES!  There is a world out there that does not want to see you succeed.  There is an enemy waiting to capture you in his evil schemes.  And there are lost children out there needing the touch of their healing Father that only YOU, His daughter, can bring them.  You MUST be aware of these things.  You are a princess, the daughter of a King, now live like one.

The Guilt of a Dreamer

My "dream list" includes spending time on every continent, gliding down the Amazon River to spend days lost in the treacherous jungles, translating the Bible for a people who have never held the Gospel in their hands before, packing up and leaving all of my troubles and struggles behind, growing old with my husband on a beach watching the sunset, and looking like Nicole Kidman when I am her age!

Those are just a few of the things I would love to do with my life. I find, however, that when I begin to dream these, or even less harmful dreams like a romantic get-away, a new outfit, or remodeling my bathroom, I begin to feel guilty.
As moms, I believe we become too accustomed to being the "nobody" of the house. Sure, we all encourage our obsessive behavior by telling each other that our homes cannot function without us...but in the process we lose who we are. It becomes a joke and laughing matter because we are lost as to what to do about it.  Our kids' and our husband's well-being come before our own. They get clothes before we do. School supplies come before our novel reading list. Their food tastes take precedence over our own. How they choose to spend free time becomes what we do. Their schedules become our schedules. We push ourselves out of fear of becoming that mom who neglects her children and puts herself and her selfish desires before that of the care of her family. We will not be that woman!

After time of living with this mind-set, we can lose sight of who we are - our passions, our dreams, our simple pleasures. When we begin to dream, our logic screams at us, "what about the kids!? How would that affect them?! That's selfish!" And then we feel guilty for ever dreaming at all.

I am writing this today because I think this is wrong. I think that God has created us with adventure and dreams in our hearts! I believe that we should be willing to take a look and see what else is out there, what more life can have in store for us! Give a little more room for yourself sometimes. You spend all of your time and extra money on your children - get yourself a gift sometimes! Plan a night out for yourself or you and your spouse! Don't be afraid to be a woman with her own dreams and desires. This doesn't necessarily mean packing up and heading out to some remote island (though it might!) but it may include breaking the unhealthy walls of the rooms we have built ourselves into. What we might find is that our marriages are strengthened because we return to being the woman our husbands married. We may make our children proud of our accomplishments and give them inspiration to reach their own goals and dreams. You may find fulfillment and pleasure in your life that you had given up hope of ever having.

Dream big!

I'm That Little Girl

I have been so frustrated this whole week. My Princess has entered into a stage where she moves slower than a sloth to do anything and absolutely nothing can motivate her to accomplish the things she needs to in a day - getting ready in the morning, caring for pets, doing her school work. The lost privileges and consequences have no effect. She simply doesn't care and doesn't understand why she should. I want to pull my hair out in exasperation at trying to get her to realize that she is missing out on so much good stuff in life by draaaaaaaagggging out the work!



Flashback. There was once another little girl just like this - me. I clearly remember being about eight years old, standing on a giant rock in the middle of my grandmother's garden, performing a song at the top of my lungs with the world as my audience. I was free! It was fun! Problem? I was supposed to be weeding the garden. My grandmother had told me that if I pulled the weeds from her flowerbed she would pay me and also take me to the movies that evening. I remember her coming out of the house time and time again to urge me to get the work done...to hurry...to stay focused and motivated. I never understood until now.

I am still that little girl. It has occurred to me that we are all like this in our spiritual walks. God is constantly urging us to do more, make more of ourselves. Our response? We would rather waste time on things that don't matter, wallow in irrelevance and get sidetracked by everything else around us! Chores, status, finances, jobs, relationships, gossip, possessions...the list could go on and on. God doesn't encourage us to push these things aside and focus on His Kingdom because He is just a big meanie! He does it because he knows that if we focus on what is truly important, if we work hard and get "things" done, then there will be rewards! Life will be more exciting and fulfilling! 

Stop dragging your feet and get busy! You've got a life to live!

You Will Never Be Good Enough

Yep, you read that right. You will never be good enough. Now hold on before you click to some other link that is more upbeat and cheery. This really is a pep-talk!

I have always been that girl that has to do everything right. I actually get very upset if I don't accomplish what I wanted to. It was great when I was younger going through school. It got me good grades. It kept me from making stupid decisions (most of the time). You get the picture. However, as a mom, it has not been a great quality to have. Of course we should always strive to do our best, but my problem was that if I didn't have all the items on my to-do list checked off, if my house wasn't up to "par," if my kids were having "one of those days," even if I were sick and didn't get my ducks in a row...I felt like I had failed. I was a failure as a mom. I was a failure as a wife. I was just a failure.

Well, in a way, the Bible says that is true. Let's explore:

Isaiah 64:6 says, "For all of us have become like one who is unclean, And all our righteous deeds are like a filthy garment;"

Ephesians 2:8-9 says, "For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God; not as a result of works, so that no one may boast."

We can never be good enough! There are never enough good things that we can do to make all of our mistakes "ok." We can never serve enough or give enough to pay the price for our wrong choices. That is why God sent His Son.

This isn't a bad thing! It's grace! It is freeing! What this tells me is that I can stop striving! I can stop trying to be perfect. I can stop trying to be the perfect mom. I will never be. I can stop trying to be the perfect wife. I will never be. But, that doesn't make me a failure. It makes me beautiful. Yes, because Jesus blood has cleansed me and I am now in right relationship with God. With His Spirit in me, guiding me and sanctifying me, I am perfect. The way that I am now seen is not based on what I have accomplished, but on what He has accomplished for me. I can live a life without the burden of checking things off the list and focus on loving others and sharing this message of grace with everyone that I can.

Now, that is a pep-talk!

After a Time of Absence...

I know that it has been a long time since I have written a blog post...there's good reason! This past summer our family was blessed with a new home. It is a gorgeous old home from 1901, which I love! It has come, however, with the additional package of needing lots of TLC! So, between moving a family with young children, trying to maintain a "semi-normal" lifestyle of work and play, and starting another school year (in a new place!), and being married to the youth pastor (speaks for itself, right?), I haven't had much time for the extras. Along the way, however, I have learned many heart lessons, overcome many frustrations, gotten in too deep into projects and have come out with lots that I would love to share with you. So I decided to pick up my technological pen and paper and begin to write once again...

 



a time to tear down and a time to build...(Ecclesiastes 3:3)

 

 

This old barn is on the property where we have moved. As cool as it is, it is completely unstable and the insurance companies have all but demanded that it come down.  So today we decided to begin the painstaking process of tearing it apart (saving wood and lumber for this and that). Included in this process however, was the task of building a temporary shelter for our sheep, who are due to lamb next week! Using the materials we were tearing off of the old barn, we were at the same time using them to build, and setting aside other pieces to build in the future!

As I began thinking about this process, I realized that this is exactly what God does with our lives. It certainly sums up what He has done with my life this past 6 months! We often come to a point in our lives when we know it is time to tear down. There are things that just gotta go. I find it difficult when I am at this point to determine which things need to be "torn down." It is a task of prioritizing and can also be painful when you finally figure out which things need to go.

Once we have made it through this time of tearing down, God then begins to use those pieces of our broken lives to build again. Whether it is leaving a home to start anew in another home, getting a new job, terminating unhealthy relationships and building new ones, tearing down walls and buildings to make new, sturdier ones, (the list goes on and on and on!)...we then begin to build again.

So what I have learned that I would like to pass on to you today is this, do not be afraid to "tear down" because it is only then that you can build again. And our God is notorious for rebuilding things much better than they were before!

 

 

 



Desperate

There was a blow up at my house today between me and my six year old daughter. We are just alike. What I realized today, however, was that my children have, over the course of some time, become spoiled.  I never wanted a spoiled child, however, I have always striven to be the best mom I could be, sacrificing to give to them, etc. And now they believe that the world revolves around them and they do not appreciate anything that they have. But what is worst of all, my daughter has begun to lack passion for things.  Today I decided to make some changes around the house. We would begin to get less until we learn to appreciate that which we have. The initial response was less-than hoped for, but we are moving forward now.

Meanwhile, seemingly unrelated, I was talking to my mom on the phone and she was telling me about one of those valleys that we all go through, when we wonder why God allows so much hardship to happen to us. Of course, my typical answer is that it is just the consequences of living in a fallen world.

As I was doing dishes, I suddenly realized that these two things are actually related to one another, extremely related. Let me explain...

We have all, at some point in our lives, been desperate for God. Desperate. As the breath that we breathe, we needed his presence, his hand in our situations, his strength, passionately desiring Him. Can you think of that time? I would bet money on the fact that this was not an easy time in your life. Quite possibly it was one of the worst times of your life. That is the connection.

Without the "valleys" of our lives, we would never experience that desperation and passion for God. If everything were peachy all the time, we would, like my daughter, lose our interest in everything, lose our appreciation for our blessings and our passion for life. Without tears, how could we experience pure joy and truly understand it? Without pain, how would we understand comfort? Without heartbreak, how would we realize true love - how would we even know it was true love without experiencing the loss of it? It is for no small reason that the saying "you never realize how much you love something until it is gone" or similar is so well known.

God wants to spoil us. God wants to give us everything. God does not want to cause us pain or suffering. But sometimes, for our own good, He allows us to endure it. This evening, my dear Spirit has spoken to my heart. I must change how I interact with my children. It is not good for me to give them everything. I must also change how I interact with my God. What do I need to strip away to be grateful of Him again? This is the focus of this household for now. May we in the near future be found desperate for Him.

Well Done!

My son had his first ever soccer game tonight. I was such a proud mama! Especially because at four years old they can play one of two ways - 1) the pick flower and play in the dirt and run around after the other kids, or 2) they see there's a ball and try to kick it...anywhere.  He was actually that second one! I was so happy that he was trying his hardest to get that ball, to listen to his coach and to be where he should be, all with a huge smile. But at the end of the game he said to me, "I'm sorry I didn't score a goal for you, Mom." Oh, no! I told him, "You do not have to score the goals to play well. You did an amazing job tonight and I am so proud of you."

This situation did reruns through my head last night until I finally realized what it was. This was a reenactment of God and his children. You've read the passages of running the race to get the crown, never giving up. Those are great! But often times that leaves me feeling a little "less than." I see the "kids" who go to the mission field and break through to Christians who have been in darkness millenia. I see the "kids" who become nationally known authors, singers, and preachers, reaching millions of people. I see the "kids" who foster households of children. I see the "kids" who travel the world building organizations to combat hunger and poverty. Then I see me and I say, "I am sorry that I didn't score those goals for you, Father." But last night, I hear His response to me, out of my own mouth!

God does not care if you make those "awesome" accomplishments. That may not be the position he has for you. The soccer team consists of more than just the forwards that score; there are middies, and defense, and goalies! Oh, boy, I bet the goalies of our spiritual lives often feel totally useless!! God wants the whole team and he wants you to play your position with dignity and heart. What you do matters, whether big or small or noticed or not. It matters greatly to the outcome of the "game." So feel great today, friend! Because your heavenly Father is proud of you.

His master said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful slave. You were faithful with a few things, I will put you in charge of many things; enter into the joy of your master.’ --Matthew 25:21

Winning the Gold

Today's prayer topic is perfect for the Olympics going on right now! Our focus today is on obedience. Have you had a chance to watch any of the Olympics? I have been watching as much as I can and it is astounding! What those athletes can do with their bodies is phenomenal. Here's the question, though. Did any of those individuals get to that point just because they knew the rules of that sport, or because they had read a lot about it? Did they get there because they decided they wanted to be an Olympian and signed up? Obviously, the answer to both questions is no. Every one of those athletes, when interviewed after their achievements, will claim that the only reason they made it that far was from hard work. They trained, day after day. They pushed themselves as far as they could push. They were never content with where they were but wanted to be better, stronger.

borrowed from www.guardian.co.uk

As Christians, we should be spiritual Olympians. We should never be content. We need to train daily and push ourselves to the limit. Here is what Paul says to us in 1 Corinthians 9:24-27:

Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last, but we do it to get a crown that will last forever.  Therefore I do not run like someone running aimlessly; I do not fight like a boxer beating the air.  No, I strike a blow to my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize.

Does that describe you? Do you want to win that gold? If not, then that is what today is about. This discipline comes from a constant obedience to God's desires for you. We begin by having time spent in his word. We cannot be obedient if we do not know what he is asking of us. There is a level of calling, however, that God places on each of our individual lives. That is only determined by seeking God's will through prayer.

As you take time to pray today, ask God to show you what it is that he desires of you. Ask him to reveal any place in your life where you are not being obedient. Ask him if you are where he desires you to be (work, church, relationships) or if he would like you to step out into something new.

"Similarly, anyone who competes as an athlete does not receive the victor’s crown except by competing according to the rules." --2 Timothy 2:5 (NIV)

True Freedom

In honor of our country's Independence Day, I wanted to write about freedom. There are so many things we could discuss in regards to this topic, but the past few days that I have had have led me to want to share about our freedom in Christ. In the United States of America, we celebrate, and hopefully hold dearly to, those freedoms that allow us to make our own choices, especially in regard to our religion. This is a blessing! Not every Christian enjoys these freedoms, though. However the Bible talks about freedom that we all find in Christ. Let's begin with Romans 6:16-21:

"Don’t you know that when you offer yourselves to someone as obedient slaves, you are slaves of the one you obey —whether you are slaves to sin, which leads to death, or to obedience, which leads to righteousness? ¹⁷ But thanks be to God that, though you used to be slaves to sin, you have come to obey from your heart the pattern of teaching that has now claimed your allegiance. ¹⁸ You have been set free from sin and have become slaves to righteousness.
¹⁹ I am using an example from everyday life because of your human limitations. Just as you used to offer yourselves as slaves to impurity and to ever-increasing wickedness, so now offer yourselves as slaves to righteousness leading to holiness. ²⁰ When you were slaves to sin, you were free from the control of righteousness. ²¹ What benefit did you reap at that time from the things you are now ashamed of? Those things result in death! ²² But now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves of God, the benefit you reap leads to holiness, and the result is eternal life."

Let me tell you a little about what's going on at my house. You know that old saying, "when it rains, it pours?" Yes, it's pouring around here! Last week, in one day, we had our hot water heater go out, our dishwasher stop running, the dryer will only run half a cycle and to top it all of beautifully,  a screw slipped on my computer when I closed it and the whole things snapped in half. Problem being, we don't make a whole lot of money to fix things all at once like this! Our landlord (love him!) replaced the hot water heater and we decided that our top priority (given how much of our ministry is done via online media - teens!) was our computer. So we spent what little savings we had and bought a computer and I resorted to washing dishes by hand. Ok, moving on. You didn't think that was all, did you? So this week the kids and I took our annual trip to St. Louis to site see with my sister (there are great free family things to do around that area!) The last day there I made a horrifying discovery: the kids and I had lice. I have no clue where it came from, but we had it bad. Therefore, I had to use the remainder of our regular savings to buy all of the treatments, sprays, etc, in order to rid ourselves of this plague! In the process of getting everything in the house washed with hot water to decontaminate, our washing machine broke. No, I am not kidding. So, my dear husband (who was my knight in shining armor this week, by the way!) and I had to break into our anniversary savings money to get a new washer. See, my daughter was born on our first anniversary, so we decided then that we would save money each year instead of celebrate, and every 5 years we would do something grand! Washing machines were not in that plan.

I guess what I am getting at is this: while we are blessed to live in the US and experience numerous freedoms, we are not free from life. We are not free from struggles and burdens and worries. The freedom that we have is the freedom to choose. We are free to choose whether these circumstances are going to get the best of us. We have the freedom to choose whether to focus on these things or to look outside ourselves for opportunities to continue the work for the Kingdom. We have the freedom to choose to wallow in hopelessness and self-pity or to rely on the never-failing faithfulness of God to supply every need. We have freedom from sin, which means no matter what the situation, we can choose God and in the end we will receive eternal life with him because of that freedom.

So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed. -- John 8:36

Borrowed from beamerfilms.com

Here's a little something I have learned from these trying times in my life - think about Job. Satan doesn't give you the time of day if he doesn't think you are worth it. But if he thinks there is some value to steering you off course, then he will give it his all. That means, that in times like these, take it as a compliment: 1) that God would find you trustworthy of such trials and 2) that Satan thinks you are worth coming after. Don't let him win. Let him throw at you whatever he will, but keep your eyes locked on Christ Jesus and focus only on what you can do to glorify him. Claim the victory of this battle and rely on Christ to be your strength.

Change of Plans

I felt heartbroken as I was laying my daughter down for bed last night and she was sharing with me that she did not have a good day because nothing went as planned. Every night we share together our favorite part of the day and our worst part of the day. We began our day excited about the plans and by 10:00 everything had changed due to problems. The day continued in that way. My heart was not broken because she had a bad day from the plan changes, rather because I know that this will happen over and over in her life. I know that plans will get rained on and dreams will get pushed aside for the burdens of everyday living. I also know that when it rains, it pours and that is how our last week has gone around here. In one day last week, it seemed like everything around me crumbled!
The hope we have, when times are crummy, is that God is faithful. So I leaned over my daughter and asked her what I always ask her after she shares her best and worst parts of the day, "How did that make you feel?" Obviously, the answer was sad. Then I asked her what always follows, "What could we have done or what should we do?" She thought and told me she did not think there was anything we could have done. I smiled and told her what I am going to tell you. When things are out of our hands, we should be thankful that we have a God who knows a whole lot more than we do. For whatever reason, He had something different planned for us than what we did. Since God knows everything and loves us so much, we can trust that His plans are better, even if we don't know why.

As most conversations with my kids do, this one left me thinking long after and applying my own medicine to my wounds. My week may have not been very good, but I can trust that God is caring for me. For whatever reason, he is allowing these things to happen and I need to trust in his all-knowing power. God is so good to us! All of us! We just need to push aside our worries and focus on our blessings!

As I close today, I would like to remind you (and me!) of the psalm which inspired this blog, psalm 23. In verse 4, David shares that things are not going so great for him, but that he will trust in God anyway, without worry or fear. Then verse 5 reveals how God blesses him for following where He leads, how he refills his cup. Let God refill your cup today!

Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil, my cup overflows.

Letting the Spirit Move in Your Plans

It was really great to be back home again, especially to have my kids back in my arms, easily kissable! I found however, that now that summer is here (and I have my babies back), there is so much that we can do! The thing is I want to do everything, but I am accomplishing nothing!

I asked a question on my facebook page to see how different women organize their day - whether it is a little-each-day schedule, a one-focus-a-day schedule, or a -whatever-is-most-important-right-now schedule.  The majority of the responses were for the whatever-is-most-important-right-now type. I think for the most part that this is good! It leaves us room to "let the Spirit move," so to speak. As we keep in mind the most important task for each day, let us always remember what Christ told us was most important:

"Jesus replied: 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind..." "Love your neighbor as yourself.'" Matthew 22:37,39

Relationships are always the most important aspect of our day. The rest can wait. I promise.

However, (you knew that was coming, right? I mean, I am a type A person!) in my opinion, the best way to make sure that you are able to follow the Spirit's lead and put relationships first is to make sure that you are accomplishing your tasks during the time that there are not other things begging your attention! If you have procrastinated that project to the deadline, have 2 hours left to get it done, and your dear friend comes over with a need, how hard will it be for you to set aside your project to have a cup of coffee and listen to her? So some semblance of a schedule is needed.

The one-focus-a-day schedule works best for me because I am easily overwhelmed when I have too much to do and get busy doing all of it at once! My husband, a youth pastor, is off on Mondays, so that is our family day! I try to get us out of the house so we are not tempted to work around the house on this day! Tuesdays are then the days that I focus on cleaning up my house after our "weekend." I usually have a day for ministry planning, a day for bills and grocery shopping, and a day for whatever else needs doing around our home. Mixed in, I try to make sure that my kids have a play date day as well. I don't (can't) schedule hourly, but simply make a list of the things I would like to accomplish that day, mixed with visits to the library, time outs with girlfriends, and t-ball games! Then, I go through my list, making sure that as I do, I am open to anything happening at any moment...as the Spirit leads!

Just remember dear friend, while God wants us to be good stewards of the blessings he has given us (time, home, children, etc!), these two verses to ponder:

Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans. Proverbs 16:3

Many are the plans in a person's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails. Proverbs 19:21

REND

I am in the midst of Spring Cleaning, so cleaning - good, thorough scrubbing - is on my mind. That is why the following verse stood out to me as I read the book of Joel this morning (it's a whole three chapters and worth the read!).

Rend your heart and not your garments. Return to the Lord your God, for He is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love, and he relents from sending calamity. --Joel 2:13

I often think in terms of cleaning my heart, even spring cleaning it, but the use of the word rend speaks to me more than just a simple cleaning. We know that Jesus Christ, by His blood shed on the cross, washes our hearts clean from sin. But what is this rending? I believe it is speaking of the Holy Spirit's sanctification of our lives. It is a deep scrubbing, to the point of tearing, of the heart. Rending. It is the type of cleaning that sometimes hurts. It's the type of cleaning that is necessary if we are to become holy vessels for God's Work. It's the type of cleaning that may require change - change of attitude, change of habit, change of lifestyle.

Are you going through this type of rending of your heart? Praise Him! He is perfecting you! I encourage you today to stay strong through the things in your life that you may be going through and to use them to rend your heart and return you to the Lord your God. And if you have been through these types of trials and are now on the other side, then Joel has a word for you as well!

Has anything like this ever happened in your days or in the days of your ancestors? Tell it to your children, and let your children tell it to their children, and their children to the next generation. --Joel 1:2b-3

Share your story, share your life!

And the Rain Comes Down...

The only planting I accomplished Saturday!

It always amazes me how the weekend can fill me up with new ideas for writing! Saturday we had plans to work in our yard. We started our day by going to our daughter's soccer game and then went to the store to buy the things we needed to begin shaping our gardens for the spring (tomorrow's the first day of spring!).  No sooner had we gotten back and I began picking up branches out of the yard with the kids, that it started sprinkling. Stubbornly, I sent the kids inside and began planting one of the shrubs I had bought. It began to hail. I figured it was a day for indoor projects.
Isn't that so much like our real lives? Sometimes, it starts sprinkling and sometimes we get stubborn even though we see the signs that God wants us going in a different direction. And sometimes, God decides to get our attention even if it hurts, and He sends the hail. We must always keep in mind that God knows what He's doing, even if we don't. I love the rain and how God can cleanse all the grass, plants and trees with that rain, giving them color and life and water. This is how the figurative rain in our lives work. After it is over we find that we have been purified and are refreshed with Everlasting Water flowing through us. We must hold strong in faith. One of my favorite songs is Stand in the Rain, by Superchick, which expresses this exact idea. We must stand in faith through the rainstorms and hailstorms in our lives.
Oswald Chambers gives us a beautiful picture of what this type of faith is like:

A life of faith is not a life of one glorious mountaintop experience after another, like soaring on eagles' wings, but is a life of day-in and day-out consistency; a life of walking and not fainting (see Isaiah 40:31). --My Utmost for His Highest, March 19

Our plans are so unlike God's plans. We must give up what we want to accomplish (working in the yard) and conform our will to God's will (coming inside and going through boxes of hand-me-down clothes). We may not know why, but if we know our God, we know that His plans are always better than ours.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." --Jeremiah 29:11

So pack that umbrella with you today, dear sister, and be ready to respond in faith when those storms come!